Relationships like collaboration
Back to the beginning of the story. Relationships are one of the most important areas of human life, but few people think about the need to learn relationships. It is believed that training in this issue occurs by itself in communication with peers and on the living example of the people around them. But the result of such self-education is no good.
Well, if the first failure in the relationship with the opposite sex was enough to realize their mistakes and correct their behavior patterns, but this does not happen – usually, men and women, until old age, walk in a circle. Instead of understanding themselves, they are simply looking for another person who will suit them, and in relations with whom there will be no need to make any effort.
Everyone wants the tale itself to come to their house. Women in their boudoirs dream of a knight-savior, not realizing that their normal moods and demands will quickly fall across their throats. And men arrange knightly tournaments and are looking for a woman who appreciates their peasant prowess, will accept, fall in love and comfort.
Women do not know and do not understand men – but they want a man to understand them, and believe that this will be enough for normal relations. Women are not interested in what a man wants, or they are satisfied with simple answers, such as the fact that a man needs only sex. And in the same way, women do not think that there is such a good thing in them that the man of their dreams devotes his life to them. This is where the egoism of the highest test.
And men are no better – they just do not understand anything in women, and therefore they are easily carried out for all manipulations, if only to satisfy the superficial feminine whims and grab a piece of that warmth that only a mother could give earlier.
Without thinking about what really leads a woman and what she really wants, a man, in all its simplicity, follows her expressed wishes. He does not understand that the woman herself will hate him for his submission. By allowing himself to be manipulated (as if out of love), a man makes a woman unhappy and leads a relationship to a dead end. He acts like a child who needs to behave himself so that his mother loves him.
And as long as relations are established for the sake of pleasure, for joint entertainment, nothing will change. Entertainment should be entertaining – there is no place for conscious efforts. Meanwhile, relationships require a lot of inner work – there is simply no happiness for free.
A man needs to purposefully learn to see a woman as a woman – a creature of the opposite sex, a reflection of his own soul, and not just another embodiment of the maternal image.
A woman can be a man’s best friend, assistant and inspiration, if you allow her to open up in this direction. Just something and the business – you need to stop hanging their snot on a woman and find in yourself enough strength to defend their men’s freedom and independence.
But you want to relax and have fun, right? – That’s just through this and you need to step over. In an adult relationship, pleasures are much greater; you just need to give up your childhood habits.
A woman, in turn, needs to learn to moderate her pride and see in a man not the executor of her desires, not a defender from all troubles and hardships, but an independent person, next to whom it will be interesting to live your life.
If you give a man freedom and respect his right to self-determination, he out of gratitude and reciprocal respect will fulfill all the desires of a woman. Men, in general, are not bastards – treat them like a human being, and they will answer the same. But a man owes nothing to a woman, and a woman is no weaker than a man to claim any privilege. We are different, but we are equal.
If a woman is wise enough to help her man grow up, she will get those relationships that she never dreamed of. But for this, she herself needs to learn to be just a woman – not a mother, not a mistress of the sea, but a woman – a companion of a man. Otherwise, you can wait all your life for your prince.
Next to us is always the person whom we deserve. And if for some reason it seems that we deserve more, then, probably, we finally lie to ourselves. Relationships can be a breeding ground for each other or turn into a compost pit where both souls just wither and decompose. Choose you.