What is true friendship?
First of all, you need to remember that there is no “friendship”. That is, there are relationships between people that can be characterized in some way, and there is a tradition to call a certain type of relationship friendship. But there is no independent entity called “friendship”. There are only real living relationships, without names and clear outlines.
It follows that concepts like “true friendship”, “true love” and the like are, in essence, absurd. If only concrete interaction between concrete people really exists, how can one draw a line between present and non-present, between friendship and non-friendship, between love and non-love?
Nevertheless, it is still accepted to draw a certain line. And this is done on the basis of an artificial rating scale. Here the situation is the same as if watching the waves in the sea. Some go from left to right, others – from right to left. And which ones are real? How to separate one wave from the other, if it all depends on which foot and on which side the observer stood up?
One way or another, it turned out to be considered that smaller waves are friendship, and abruptly waves are love. But what is important is not the labels that we hang on them, not our opinions, but the waves themselves. That is, the specific living relationship with a living person is important, and not what we call them, and under what pattern we are trying to fit them.
So is it worth it at all to talk about what “true friendship” is? Let’s better see what friendship is understood in practice, and what all this leads to.
Women are practical and pragmatic creatures. From a social point of view, this may not always look beautiful, because such far-fetched principles as loyalty and devotion do not exist for women in general. But from the point of view of psychology, such sobriety causes only admiration. Men should learn this from women.
Female friendship always has the character of a temporary union. As two independent states, which, first of all, consider their own interests. Sometimes, it is useful to have an ally. But do kings and presidents swear eternal loyalty? No, the union exists exactly as long as it is profitable.
So women – while making friends is convenient and profitable, they are best friends. But as soon as interests crossed – the end of friendship. In words, slogans about loyalty may sound, but in practice a woman will act exactly as it is beneficial to her, and will simply find an excuse in that the case is exceptional, and she could not do anything with herself.
And this is really good. Because a woman deceives herself and others only in words, and in actions she is always more or less honest with herself. But men for the sake of friendship and this oath can derail their whole lives, and there is nothing to be proud of.
The main stumbling block in women’s friendship is men. This is where friendship ends and the law of the jungle comes first – every man for himself. And if it so happened that the interests in respect of the men crossed, the end of the union.
Yes, sometimes, women’s friendship lasts a lifetime, but it only says that these women had nothing to compete with. And if one of them refused a man, for the sake of another, then this, most likely, means that it didn’t hurt.
So what are women allied with? As long as the friendship between women is maintained, it is quite similar to the male one — the same mutual assistance in business and the same mutual assistance in overcoming mental difficulties.
For women, it is not considered something shameful to cry on each other’s shoulder and to regret each other in the most direct way. And this, again, is a reason to admire female candor in expressing one’s feelings. It is this emotional support that keeps women together. Help in practical matters is much less important to them.
Therefore, when a woman finds a man who is ready to wipe her tears, all the best friends fade into the background – they are no longer necessary. The man consoles and solves the everyday problems of the woman, so why should she be friends with someone else?
Applause for women’s honesty and loyalty to their personal interests.